But really. I wouldn’t get any satisfaction beating up an unattractive person. I need to get something perfect and fuck it up.

I threatened to bring a gun to school and shoot every one of you. and none of you heard me. Thank God. because I’m not going to. I’m just going to secretly hate every single one of you. My reason? I don’t have a really good one. I just loathe every single one of you for one reason or another. It may be one small thing. But I can never love someone completely. There will always be that one thing or those few things that I hate. I find something I hate in everything. Either because it reflects something I hate about myself or something I want or something I just find repulsive.

I’ll never be as skinny as you or a pretty as you or have as many friends as you or have a great personality or pretty skin or eyelashes or nose or feet or hands or have as much control or be as smart as you. That’s why I hate you.